FASHION INTERNATIONAL PRESS RELEASE
NEW GURU TAKES CENTRE STAGE

The world mourns the sad and untimely losing of Gianni Versaci. No longer will the phrases "Darling", "Princess" and "My babies" grace the cat walks of the world with the same forceful passion that echoed the ethos and aura of this great man.

However, hope springs eternal. From within the midst of our sorrow, a small flickering beaconof salvation emerges to once again illuminate our drab and colourless lives. Wardrobes around the world are set to accommodate a new breed of quality and excellence. Campbell, Schaffer and women the world over yearn the impending elevation to new heights of fashion. And who is this dynamic trend setting Messiah?

The unmistakable Yorkshire twang grows in volume from the sleepy hamlet of Milnsbridge. New catch phrases echo around the fashion houses of Milan, Paris, London and New York. "Your husband looks a mess!", "What is that man wearing?" and "Is that a pile of rags at the table?" announces the emergence on to the world clothing stage of that new "style icon" that is John Smith, Man of Fashion.

Women; Your lives are about to be transformed.

Husbands; Chuck out your rags and chuck out Oxfam.

The above is a FAX sent by the Husband of a work colleague, (Val), following a comment I made at my 40th birthday party, which they both attended.

Val was very smartly dressed, and had her hair done, she looked very smart, but her husband, David, wore a grey sweat shirt, which was quite a contrast to Val.

It was meant more as a compliment to Val than an insult to David, really.

Have a look at the photograph on the right and see what you think, (Click on the photo to see an enlargement).